You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
