Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
