apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
