when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I haven't been this sober since birth.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
