The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
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Real men use motor oil.
Real men use axle grease for harder strokes.
Attempted?! If he was desperate enough for canola oil, you probably should have given him just a few minutes. .. it probably wouldn't have been long.
You're supposed to use olive oil, good for your skin.
Love the comment WhiskerBiscuit...