Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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