Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
