We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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