Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
