I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
