so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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