Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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