Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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