Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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