I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
third nipple confirmed
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
