did you get engaged???
I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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