in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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