I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
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Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
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You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
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