Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Randomize
