that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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