Will you blow on my dice?
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
