Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.