I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
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Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.