I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I should be sponsored by Trojan
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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