Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
birth control should be required to get into college
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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