Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
