I wish my penis had an off switch
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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