hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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