Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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