just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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