You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
