Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize