He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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