is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
