Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
