butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
