It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Randomize
