they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
