My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
You ever have a fart follow you around?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
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