she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize