2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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