i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I just gargled with NyQuil
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
