Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
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