you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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