Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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