i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
