at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
We have started to decorate penises.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Randomize
