U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
dude. I can hear the air.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
