I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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