Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
