you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
